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7 Types of People to Avoid by Anna Johnson, Success Accelerator

26 Mar

Sad to say, there are some people in this world who will hinder your success and happiness.

I urge you to avoid these people as much as you can. Firstly, because they’ll consume a lot of your energy for no real benefit… secondly, because being with them will undermine your success and happiness… and finally, because there are plenty of good people who are more deserving of your attention, and in turn, will do much more for you.    

If you can’t avoid negative people altogether, put your emotional ‘armor’ on whenever you’re near them. By all means be civil, moral and ethical… but be careful not to let them ‘get to you’ (whether or not they mean to).

Here are 7 types of people to avoid. Those who are – when it comes to their relationship with YOU – predominantly:

1. Evil – people who are immoral, unethical and malicious.

2. Dishonest – people who lie, are deceitful and can’t be trusted.

3. Selfish – people who nearly always put themselves first and just can’t seem to empathize with anyone else.

4. Negative – people who leave you feeling bad about yourself. They can do this overtly or quite subtly. The clue lies in how you feel during, or just after, being around them. If you somehow feel a little worse… they’re negative.

5. Self-centered – people who constantly talk about themselves… to the point where you’ll mention something peculiar to your own life, and they’ll still find an angle that’s about them!

6. Uncommunicative – people who constantly need to be prodded for any kind of communication, let alone meaningful contribution. They’re inherently uncommunicative and reactive… and hard work to deal with.

7. All of the above – don’t walk away from someone like this: RUN!

Now, let me add that someone you find to be negative, may NOT be a negative influence on someone else. And apart from people who, in their dealings with you, seem evil, dishonest or selfish, a negative person may not be a ‘bad’ person. They may just be a ‘bad match’ for you.

This is not about judging people – it’s about you deciding who to associate with for your own sanity, success and happiness.

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9 Comments

Posted by on March 26, 2007 in Uncategorized

 

9 responses to “7 Types of People to Avoid by Anna Johnson, Success Accelerator

  1. Joann

    April 2, 2007 at 2:00 am

    What if this is your majority of your family ? My brothers that think I made up my disabilities and got S.S. Disabilities and tried to get me to stop my high blood pressure meds. and all others that my doctors where trying to kill me. I guess the diabetes should be avoided to ! Not. I have to live with my parents because of my disadvantages and have let them take me down by words and the others have been painful and I let them make me feel like I should live on the streets even though I’m the only one who helps my elderly parents. But they have said some of the same things not so helpful. I pay my bills and for my foods and medications I’m not a drinker or a drug addict and I see a therapist that tells me to move when I get a chance, well I’m 501 on the list in one county and the other I have been on for 5 years and I see no way out . I have to keep my faith they have tried to take everything else away from me that they could and been successful. I have to pray a lot and sometimes I get over whelmed and forget to and feel horrible because I know God has carried me through all of this ans continues to do so.

     
  2. crystalreflections

    April 2, 2007 at 12:30 pm

    Hi Joann.
    First of all, I applaud you for trying your best to be strong. I do not have diabetes but I do know that sometimes, it can be hard to manage. I also know that the people around you plays a big role in being able (or not) to deal with this. I cannot imagine being in your situation day in and day out. However, I also believe that trials come with the grace and strength to go through it. I know that you are a strong woman and that your strength does not only come from within you but from the grace and love of God. In your own words, “God has carried me(you) through all of this and continues to do so”. Keep that in your heart, hold on to your faith because it’ll keep you from fallling apart.
    Secondly, you are doing such a good job helping your parents in spite of them not believing in you. Know that you will be blessed – you most certainly are already, you just don’t notice it.
    I know very little of your situation but I think if you take small baby steps, you’ll get there sooner than later.
    – Start by listing down people, things, life happenings that you are thankful for. This can be tangible or not, past or present. Take a good 10 minutes doing this – when you feel that there’s no more, think bigger. Take a bigger glimpse of your life. I’m sure you’ll need more than 10 minutes but 10 minutes should be good for now.
    – Next, think of the 5 things that you do not like that has happened/ is happening in your life. Write it down. You can only choose 5. The rest goes down the drain for now.
    – After the first task, you should feel a little better, having seen what’s great in your life. The second task may bring you down a little bit. Now, beside each item on the second task, identify and write down if this is to your liking. Would you have wanted that to happen again if you are to live your life over? Could you have done something different to prevent it from happening? Beside that, what could you do to make it better? Feel free to use some of the items on the first task as resources.
    Do this practice everyday if you need to. It’ll keep your focus back to the most essential things.
    You see, life is all good. Life is ideal. Life is full of blessings and positivity… UNTIL… trials come , relationships are broken, sickness engulfs the physical being. The truth is, sometimes, things don’t go as we planned. That’s reality. The key is to stay focused and learn to let go – focus on our blessings and things that we are able to change – and let go of the things that we cannot control.
    Family will never go away so you might be better off trying to work with them, rather than against – they already are doing that from what I see in your comment above. In your situation, it may help to express kindness when someone slaps you with rudeness. Just tiny things. A glass of water, a simple “Hi, how are you?”, a kind word. Have you tried praying for the most difficult people in your life? It produces miracles, I tell ya. You can start small and yet yield big results.
    Good luck. I uttered a prayer for you and your family. Let us know how it goes.

     
  3. Joann

    April 13, 2007 at 12:03 am

    Thank You ! I will do as you have suggested. I can think of many good things that has happened in my life and I will have a lot to right about. Now about the only 5 things there is a large list I have to pick from. The things to be grateful for are there and I thank God every day for them. I do pray for them and it seems like the devil is intervening more than less. My parents seems to have been touched by God, so there is some prayers being answered. I have a question this person I thought to be a christian friend has done many harmful things toward me and I have forgave her and forgave her until the forgiving is turned into I want no more to do with her. However, she is friends with another friend of mine and when I go visit she lives right beside of the one and I don’t know how to react I’m nice but I really don’t have much to say to her and I don’t really want her near me because of her dishonest ways has all came out and I don’t know how to handle this I can’t just not speak .Everything a person says she makes it into a something totally different so I can’t enjoy a conversation with my good friend without the other one coming over and distorting our conversation. My hurt from all this time is turning into anger, her adult daughter is in on this also, she told the fire investigator that I possibly could have started a fire in the woods right beside of our house. I wasn’t at home one and two I would never do anything like that , and the firemen’s lives and homes that were in danger wasn’t funny. It was a serious forest fire, I’m so hurt and angry I feel like screaming, I know God said revenge is his, but if someone is doing some thing wrong is it wrong to get a little revenge myself ? I just so disgusted with the fact that someone could try to accuse me of something of this nature and these people break laws every day . I can’t understand why they would try to do some thing like this> Is this a common in people to act like this ? I would never do something like this and I find it hard to understand why anyone would act in this manner. Thank you for your other advice, and prayer, God Bless You.

     
  4. mkrules

    April 13, 2007 at 4:13 pm

    Joann: I think there is a difference between forgiving and allowing yourself to be treated badly again and again. You can forgive your friend but also not want to be around that behavior. That is totally understandable. I have many people in my life who consistently repeat their bad behaviors. One friend I did not talk to for a few years over it. Now we are buddies again and she is different, so it is all good. Sometimes distancing yourself for a while and making it clear that while you forgive them, their behavior is not okay makes a big difference and sends a good message.

     
  5. Joann

    April 14, 2007 at 2:16 am

    Thank you for all You valuable words !

     
  6. mkrules

    April 19, 2007 at 3:18 am

    You’re welcome! You deserve to be treated with respect. You can be loving AND be loved. It is okay and healthy! I love this site and I hope you continue to read/post here. Crystal really puts up some positive and inspiring stuff!

     
  7. Colleen

    April 25, 2007 at 9:49 pm

    I do pray for the most difficult people in my life like the article asks
    you to do and things ALWAYS work out for the better when I dont
    hold a grudge and just release them.

     
  8. crystalreflections

    April 27, 2007 at 9:24 am

    O my goodness!
    I am so sorry for missing-in-action for a while… I have been so busy that even at home, I rarely surfed.
    Thanks, Colleen anf mkrules, for stepping in and for the very, very good advice. One thing I love about blogs is that we learn both ways. I learn from what I write and share – I learn from readers’ comments and I hope that readers learn from all of us too… Thanks!
    Joann, I hear what you are saying. I, too, do not understand what some people are thinking when they do such things. It blows my mind that they can even contemplate about it. But then, I don’t know them in and out. I don’t know what’s going on in their lives. I don’t know why they came to this point – maybe just as much as I don’t understand why they are doing it. It makes me sad.
    Then again, I cannot change that. I cannot force anyone to change their ways. I can, however, be a model, an example. I can choose to respond rather than to react. I can choose to just think about what is essential at that particular moment. I can choose to keep my focus. I know it is hard when there is a lot of history behind it but everything’s worth another try, in my opinion. The bottomline is, though it hurts, sometimes, I will not let a past experience define what’s coming in my future. I will turn that experience around and make smarter choices so I don’t get myself back to where I was.
    Also, try to distance yourself from people who keep pushing you down. I am sure your good friend will understand if you cannot come over because the other person is there. Do not allow yourself to be in a situation where your peace will be compromised. There is nothing wrong with protecting yourself. In fact, in your situation, you really need to do that. It seems like the people around you know you pretty well and they know that you are vulnerable.
    Keep praying… The good thing about being down is, there’s no other way but up.

     
  9. kmhchimo

    June 16, 2007 at 3:47 am

    One of the hardest lessons I have learned is to STOP “taking it”. A lot of the time, those negative comments have become a habit. I hate “confrontations” so I would just walk away. Nowadays, I tell people how I feel. “Why did you say that? You have hurt my feelings.” Usually they will apologize. Some will try and make excuses: “Oh, you misunderstood what I meant.” or “You’re too sensitive.” You have a RIGHT to your feelings, whether or not other people think you do. Just making them aware of the hurtful nature of what they say has often been enough, especially if I confront them 3-4 times. They then SEE the pattern of their put-down behaviour and become more sensitized. As for your so-called friends, anyone who ever attacked ME the way these people have you, and said nothing in my defence, would not be considered my friend. Tell that mother & daughter to their faces what you have observed and that you will not tolerate it. And ask the friend you like to visit if she supports YOU, or believes their lies. If she is a true friend, she will not welcome them to her house while you are visiting. “just say no” is a great motto to follow: God didn’t have time to make a ‘nobody’ and we do NOT have to be doormats for anyone. JMHO kmh

     

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